In the book Feral Self-Care, Mandi Em shares the enormous importance of exploring simple ways to find relaxation and joy. She points to activities we might think are cool but fail to often DO, such as foraging for food, watching the skies, and turning off the lights to know the dark.
Want to know what I love about her book?
All of the suggestions are free things you can do with yourself or with friends. A lot of her suggestions are based in basic mindfulness practices, and some of the suggestions are practices I offer in forest bathing and nature therapy classes.
Play in the mud? Of course!
Even paint some on my arms and face, sure!
Primally scream? Done that.
Hug a tree? (I even massaged one and let it massage me.)
Role play or pretend play in the woods?
Sing to the squirrels?
Yes, yes, yes.
Pet a bee?! I'll admit- I haven't done this one. It wasn't Mandi but a client who told me that she learned how to pet sleeping bees. It's on my discovery list.
I'm lucky to have a child who is adventurous and creative, so many of the “feral” activities in this book I have do regularly. The truth is, I did them before I had a child, too.
However, it always helps me to review a list of fun and self-satisfying things to do,
because I forget and get swept up into the busyness of life.
For example, each spring it takes a while before I remember that I can take my shoes and socks off and put my feet directly on the hearth. When it was 80 in February, it just didn’t occur to me. Also, when my child was little, I got in such a habit of keeping shoes on, because I felt overwhelmed with taking care of a toddler and did not want to risk stepping on something sharp. I didn’t want to tend to my own injury while tending to her as well. Now that she's older, sometimes I just forget I can put sole to soil.
One of the main points she stresses about being in nature-
that I also emphasize-
is
do what feels good to you.
When we spend time listening to our body, heart, and soul, we will learn to tune into what’s right for us and also good for the earth. When do the corners of our mouths turn up in a genuine smile? Most of us are so tuned into screens and engaging on the outside that it requires taking a few moments to tune in to the inside, especially to what feels good.
Compare the hijacked mind to the soul’s whisper.
My mind has been trained in many ways- by education, mass media, my upbringing, etc. It has to sift through competing messages. It’s also been trained by meditation, but it’s still often confused. To cross check it, I listen to my body, and to my spirit.
In January, we had a super cold snap of weather that gave us below freezing temperature for 2 weeks. In my country house on a hill, whipped by wind, we left one faucet dripping. Not wanting to waste water, I began to haul buckets of dripped water from the bathroom to other locations in the house. I used it to wash dishes, water plants, soak dry beans, and more. At first my mind said this work was tedious. Then I listened to my body and realized that I liked this simple occasional weightlifting. Then I tuned into my soul. It felt so natural, so right and so pleasing. Hauling water was tapping into my need for primal human motion.
One last example:
The deer ate half of our garden last year. My partner vowed that we would get ready for a better garden season with deer protection in place. But our lives are (still too) busy and we haven't made it happen- yet. But my soul knew I needed to plant seeds in February, whether or not the new garden fence would be ready. Planting seeds and watching them sprout under grow lights is so energizing for me! It is not a waste of time if it gives me delight.
There are some seeds that are so tiny, I marvel at how they become plants.
There are other seeds that feel so good to roll around my fingers and palms.
Other seeds make me laugh, like the beet seed. It has such an unusual crown-pointed, gem like shape.
The artichoke seed has a color variation that wows me even though it is subtle.
I am not an “artist,” but the art lover in me gets to fawn over nature’s creation.
As the seeds uncurl, sometimes with the seed shells still riding on top of them… as the leaves make their way toward the sky… something deep insides me knows I'm supposed to watch this.
We can be so amazingly alive.
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